On Our Watch

The most terrifying horror movie of the 2020s isn’t about a masked slasher or a haunted basement; it’s about an app that tells you you’re walking three seconds too slowly. I sat down to watch On Our Watch (originally titled E noi come stronzi rimanemmo a guardare) while my robot vacuum was aggressively bumping into my big toe, and the irony of being bullied by a piece of plastic while watching Fabio De Luigi get bullied by an algorithm was not lost on me. This is a film that takes our current "gig economy" anxiety and turns it into a neon-soaked, bittersweet comedy that feels uncomfortably like a documentary from next Tuesday.

The Algorithm Always Wins

The setup is a masterclass in modern irony. Arturo, played with a perfect "sad sack" energy by Fabio De Luigi (10 Days Without Mom), is a high-level tech manager who creates an algorithm designed to optimize company productivity. The algorithm is so good, it immediately concludes that Arturo himself is redundant. It’s the ultimate "congratulations, you played yourself" moment. Watching Arturo’s smug corporate confidence evaporate in the face of his own code is the kind of darkly satisfying schadenfreude that only a post-pandemic audience can truly savor.

Arturo’s descent from the C-suite to the bicycle seat is swift. He ends up as a rider for "Fuuber," a delivery giant led by a messianic tech-bro named John Fuuber, played with unsettling, glassy-eyed charisma by Eamon Farren (The Witcher, Twin Peaks: The Return). The Fuuber app is a digital overseer that tracks every breath, every calorie, and every millisecond. If Arturo doesn't smile enough while handing over a lukewarm pizza, his rating drops, and his livelihood vanishes. It’s a biting satire of the "democratization of work" that really just feels like digital feudalism with better branding.

Holographic Hearts and Data Caps

Where the film finds its weird, pulsing heart is in the relationship between Arturo and Stella (Ilenia Pastorelli). Stella isn't a person; she's a "hologram-for-girlfriend," a high-tech AI designed to be the perfect companion based on Arturo's data profile. Ilenia Pastorelli (They Call Me Jeeg) is fantastic here, managing to play a digital construct with just enough "uncanny valley" stiffness to remind us she’s code, but enough warmth to make us understand why Arturo is falling for her.

The conflict arises when Arturo’s financial ruin means he can’t afford the "premium" subscription for Stella. Seeing him try to maintain a relationship with a woman who literally glitches out or starts speaking in advertisements because he hasn’t paid the monthly fee is both hilarious and deeply depressing. It’s a sharp commentary on how our most intimate connections are being mediated—and monetized—by companies that see us as nothing more than a series of data points.

A Sidelined Satire

Directed by Pif (the stage name of Pierfrancesco Diliberto), who also stars as Arturo's eccentric roommate Raffaello, the film carries that specific Italian brand of social observation seen in his earlier work like The Mafia Kills Only in Summer. However, On Our Watch feels more global, more "now." Despite its sharp wit, the film largely vanished after its 2021 release. Part of this was the "streaming shuffle"—it was a Vision Distribution title that hit during a period when audiences were still flickering between home viewing and a hesitant return to theaters.

There’s also the reality that contemporary comedies about the soul-crushing nature of tech often feel a bit too much like a Tuesday morning at the office. We’re living in a world of ChatGPT and automated layoffs, so watching a guy lose his girlfriend because his credit card declined for a "hologram update" might hit a little too close to the bone for some. It’s a "hidden gem" not because it’s a masterpiece, but because it captures a very specific, slightly frantic energy of the early 2020s that many of us are trying to forget.

Stuff You Didn't Notice

One of the more interesting trivia bits is that Eamon Farren—the only non-Italian in the main cast—is dubbed into Italian, which actually enhances his character’s alien, disconnected tech-god persona. It makes John Fuuber feel like a universal entity rather than a specific person.

Additionally, the film’s title in Italy translates roughly to "And we stood there like morons watching," a reference to the passive way society accepts the slow erosion of rights and dignity in exchange for the convenience of a 15-minute grocery delivery. Apparently, the production had to use a specific type of LED lighting to get Stella’s holographic glow to look "realistic" without relying entirely on post-production CGI, giving the film a tangible, grounded sci-fi aesthetic that feels more Blade Runner than Star Wars.

On Our Watch is a movie that understands the joke is on us. It takes the "Black Mirror" premise and injects it with enough Italian charm and physical comedy to keep it from being a total downer. Fabio De Luigi is the perfect avatar for our collective frustration, and while the ending might feel a bit rushed, the journey through the neon-lit hellscape of the gig economy is well worth the rental fee. It’s the kind of film that makes you want to delete your delivery apps—at least until you realize you're too tired to cook.